Reality check
Let’s talk about reality. Lately I feel like the line between what’s real and what’s not has become a little blurry. I’d even go so far as to say that a good source of this ‘line blurring’ is the various forms of entertainment that have settled into our lives all too comfortably through books, movies and television.
The obvious targets here are shows like Keeping up with the Kardashians, The Hills, The Real Housewives franchise and even My Super Sweet Sixteenth. They have brought exorbitant wealth into our homes and we watch in awe as the ‘stars’ lavish money on extravagant parties, homes, cars, gifts, beauty treatments, clothing and make-up.
Recently I’ve started to wonder just what impact that has on us as viewers. It certainly isn’t my reality or the reality of 80% of the human population that lives on less than $10 a day. The reason I can’t remember the last time I bought my rap superstar boyfriend a $500,000 car or televised my marriage to the tune of $2 million is because it never happened.
Of course these are just television shows and at some point we as adults need to take responsibility for not only what we watch but what we choose to believe and decide to act on. But wait a minute, what about the younger generations? From early on they have seen this frivolous spending and exorbitant living played out in front of them and now feel a sense of entitlement and it makes you wonder if they appreciate the true value of things like game consoles, luxury cars and expensive clothes or if they just feel like these items are a part of normal living because, that’s what happens on reality television shows.
It may sound ridiculous, but it’s true. The younger sister of one of my good friends is regularly gifted with expensive items like an iPad, iPhone, concert tickets, overseas trips in first-class luxury and rides in expensive cars. Can you really blame the young girl for receiving these? I suppose not, she doesn’t choose to be given them. Can you blame the parents for wanting to give their child the best and spoil her? Not really, they love their daughter and want her to have a wonderful life. My issue with the whole thing is that she doesn’t appreciate a scrap of it. Why not? Because she see’s these scenario’s played out on ‘reality’ television everyday, if it’s happening to the Kardashians then why can’t it happen to her? The lines are blurred.
At the risk of being hunted down by an angry mob of women I’m going to go so far as to say that hysteria-inducing novels like Twilight and Fifty Shades have altered the reality of love and relationships too.
But these books are works of fiction and again must be taken with a grain of salt, so why aren’t they? I was told the story of a woman who, after reading Twilight, left her husband because she didn’t feel their love compared to that of Edward and Bella. That’s a tad excessive and hopefully not all that common, but these books do have women and men alike questioning their relationships and comparing them to something that isn’t real.
If your boyfriend is an obsessive, controlling member of an ancient vampire family that wants to eat you but instead marries and impregnates you with a hybrid vampire-human spawn which labels you as public enemy number 1 to an ancient order of vampire aristocracy, you’ve got problems. Most of which will centralise around the fact that all of the things I’ve just mentioned simply aren’t possible and more likely than not you have huge mental health bills.
Fifty Shades is another offender on my naughty list at the moment. Now let’s be honest here, how many times have you or someone you know met an egomaniac, sexually depraved billionaire that wants to enslave you as his submissive sex partner but instead, after a number of attempts on your life, marries you and impregnates you with his love child? I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess none. But if this does happen to you, don’t worry because you will live in his uber expensive penthouse, zip around in helicopters and dress in nothing but the finest silks.
The picture of love that these books are painting, while clearly works of fiction, is becoming ingrained in our minds because of the mass hysteria sweeping the planet. The television shows, movies and books combined are creating a sense of entitlement centered on unrealistic expectations. Women now want a man who obsesses over them day and night, lavishes them with excessive gifts, is insanely rich and looks like a Greek God. Your regular hard-working male doesn’t stand a chance. Install a winch in your bedroom, buy some red silk sheets and in you’re in with a chance, lads.
Relationships are hard work and getting the material items that you want in life is hard work. The chances of you meeting a billionaire that is obsessed with you, loves you to death and wants to take care of you are slim. More likely than not you will still meet a wonderful man, who loves you to death, is obsessed with you and wants to take care of you but he won’t be a billionaire. He will be a regular man and you will fight over stupid things like empty toilet rolls, missing television remotes and faulty smoke alarms because that is what reality is and it doesn’t mean your love is any less incredible.
I’m not here to bash anyone, I am a woman and I have read all of the books and watched all of the television shows and movies I’ve mentioned here. In fact I’m not even saying that every person out there is exactly as I’ve described above. What I am saying though is that there are a lot of external influences which can change our perception of reality and I think it’s very important to be aware of them.
Don’t get caught up in needing ‘the things’ like big parties, expensive cars, Tiffany jewellery and penthouse apartments to make you feel good or more loved and if you do have them, appreciate them because they aren’t something you’re entitled to, they’re something you’ve been gifted with either by someone else or through your own hard work.
Everyone’s love is different. Your husband or wife may love you to death but may not say it every five seconds, routinely buy you gifts, try to suck your blood or chain you to a wall and whip you, but that doesn’t make your love any less important, special or meaningful. If anything it makes it more important because it’s just yours, it’s unique.
littlegreybox.
21 Comments on “Reality check”
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littlegreybox is a meeting point of humorous perspective, food and travel experiences and my life journey. It's my outlet, a source of inspiration and a way to share and connect with people around the world.
Interesting points, although I hadn’t heard of and don’t watch the shows you mention and refused to read those books, too. But I get your point. How many kids are growing up today with a sense of entitlement? And what is that going to do to our future prison population?
Love it!! And so true :)
Books, music, games, and forms of what can be loosely terms ‘art and entertainment’ have been modes of escape from reality since the time immemorial (think of Roman games for instance). However, what is unique to our time is mass production, proliferation of both material on offer and visualisation of it via TV and internet. So not only that we have over-production but we are also robbed of ‘luxury’ to use our own imagination by never ending shows, clips, etc. Young girls/boys no longer ‘dream’ or imagine their lives, even if they ‘dream’ about it, the pictures evoked in their minds are most likely fashioned on shows, clips they watch. I believe that true consequences of such ‘programming of human mind’ by commercially produced ‘reality’ will have profound consequences on the future of human race.
Reblogged this on Jade's .
I loved your article. I agree with every bits of it. Though current reality is something that doesn’t match with tv reality. Unfortunately not many people are aware of it and without even considering what’s real,they desire what’s being pictured for them
Just finished 50 shades..terrible, but i was determined to finish.
I agree with parts of this. I definitely think it is an interesting aspect of the fantasy-reality blend of fiction, especially since it is aimed at young adults. But I also think that we humans do have a pretty ingrained sense of reality. Not many kids grow up thinking, “Go, Dog, Go” really occurred or that Hagrid will show up to drag them off to Hogwarts. Hoping for that is entirely different to actually changing behavior. While more kids may be showered in gifts than ever before, I don’t think it’s a kid-meets-fictional-media thing. If anything, I might suggest parents see their kids watching this crap and feel a need to somehow “step up.” Does anyone else feel similarly?
Actually, I’m going to disagree with you. But in a nice way :) Your example of Harry Potter, while true in your point, I’d like to rebuff with others. Take for example Harry Potter World in Disney World – people may know that it can’t be real, but they will do whatever they can to make it as close to reality as possible. Or Pottermore online. Or the growth of Quidditch teams on college and high school campuses. I absolutely love fantasy and fairytales – but I agree with littlegreybox. They can be taken way out of context, beyond enjoyment, and forced onto other people. As humans, we tend to emulate the things we see that we value. If girls are reading Twilight and valuing that, they want it for themselves. I’ve seen that played out myself in girls that I know or have seen. If someone watches My Super Sweet 16, they might value the status that gives and desire something for themselves. The point is – we become discontent with what we have, which is, as I see it, the point of this blog. When we become discontent because of something unrealistic that we lust after, that is us not understanding reality, and the worth and joy that it brings. ‘Tis all I have to say :) I’m glad you voiced your disagreement though. Kudos.
That was really well said. You did sum up my point perfectly, it’s lovely to read your comment and know that you read it the same way as I thought it (if that makes any sense whatsover). That said, like you, I appreciate any comment that someone takes the time to leave so Andre – enjoyed your perspective on things too my friend! There’s no ‘one’ way of seeing things in the world and that’s what so great about forums like these. Thank you both for reading my post.
I did some research and I completely agree with you. Thanks for alerting me to the college quidditch teams and the other things. While I was aware of Potter World in FL (and always thought of it as just another way for them to make money), I was unaware of the extent of homegrown Pottermania. Thanks for letting me in on that, and I am glad you rebuffed me. :)
I just want it to be noted that I’m one of two men out of the 22 people who liked this post so far. Also this is one of my pet topics! The TV shows and the literature you referred to are what I’d like to deem pornography for woman. But let me not get going on all of that now.
Something else I noticed was these lines: ” Can you blame the parents for wanting to give their child the best and spoil her?”
I remember watching Oprah (by mere accident of course), she had the father of some woman who had about 20 children and no husband on the stage. He tried to explain how their family affairs could come to this:
“I don’t know what we did wrong! We spoiled her rotten.”
More often than not, language eventualy follows the dictates of society, so if we’ve already come to the point of making positive connotation with “spoil” and “spoil rotten”, then well, that might be exactly where the problem lays.
Nonetheless, I’ll go jump in my warm bed now, with a warm cup of whatever I’d like, then I’ll switch the TV on to help me forget that I AM THE RICH!
“I don’t know what we did wrong! We corrupted her to the point of decay.”
Wow, this is beautiful. Somehow, it reminds me of what my grandparents would tell me about love and life. In these modern times though, it may seem old and boring to my kids’ generation but these are the things that I want them to believe in too…how to encourage them to absorb all these is harder though nowadays. But I always have to try. Or else the Kardashians win. =<
http://wp.me/p2tuId-6U 50 Shades of Blah – my friends are over me banging on about how bad these are!
As for reality tv – hilarious, disgusting fun – just don’t blur the lines…..and bring back good quality Australian shows instead of filling prime time with rot! Love your posts x
Excellent post – and so true!!! It is important to install these values into the younger generation, but hard, maybe harder these days, because when I was small ‘no’ was ‘no’!
Amen my dear blogging friend, amen. I haven’t read all the books, seen all the movies or series, but I saw a large chunk of them. What you describe is just bold truth, though a lot of people might feel offended by what you just wrote. It is how many people are beginning to see this world.
Movies like Fifty Shades and Twighlight changed the image of prince charming. He is no longer that guy who treats his love special and says all the right things. No, thanks to the media, the image to live to becomes even more unreal. Now a man has to be an egocentric, paranoid, dominant guy who likes to enslave his wife one moment and is the perfect charmer the next. Looking at all this, I ask myself one question and one question only. What happened to a good heart and a beautiful soul? Have they truly become insignificant? Does love no longer concur everything? Is it still everything, but no longer the only thing?
Yes, I exaggerate it all too, but the point comes across. The times where just simple love did it all seems long gone. Although people like you are still aware, which makes me hopeful for the future.
amazing post!
you are too right, so many lose touch with reality, because of the “reality” they are being fed. spot on!
x
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This post is so well written and entertaining. Definitely following.
i totally agree with everything here. being a modern teen (not in America though) i have to say, the whole materialistic perspective on life is becoming a little extreme. having an iPhone in high school is now apparently normal (!?) – heck i saw a couple primary kids playing on one on their way home. designer is becoming mainstream and money is becoming the currency of happiness :(
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